Social Intelligence Winners!
I had this friend. Let's call him Nice. He thought the best way to generate respect for himself was to be strong and forceful in social situations. Imagine Bill O'Reilly at a dinner table (that's scary enough already) with a group of English and Philosophy majors. If Socrates was the discussion, Nice's response was, "Maybe if Socrates had a real job he wouldn't have been sentenced to death or exile." Huh? We all understood that statements like these were born out of his social inadequacy, but they kept coming, hence HAD a friend. Perhaps I would still call this guy friend if he had the chance to read Karl Albrecht's new book Social Intelligence.
Karl Albrecht defines social intelligence (SI) as the ability to get along well with others while winning their cooperation. SI is a combination of sensitivity to the needs and interests of others (sometimes called social radar), an attitude of generosity and consideration, and a set of practical skills for interacting successfully with people in any setting. Nice just didn't possess any of these characteristics, and I can just imagine what Bill O'Reilly is saying, rather hollering, right now (because, of course, O'Reilly is an avid reader of inBubbleWrap).
In the forward to Social Intelligence, Warren Bennis quotes Victor Hugo as saying, "There is one thing more powerful than all the armies of the world, and that is an idea whose time has come." What a great quote. Bennis goes on to say, "Social intelligence, particularly as articulated so clearly in this groundbreaking book, may be such an idea. And the time could not be more ripe for a new understanding of ourselves, both as individuals and as members of the human community."
Albrecht has developed a model for understanding and implementing social intelligence call S.P.A.C.E, which stands for: Situational Awareness, Presence, Authenticity, Clarity, and Empathy. To summarize, S.P.A.C.E. is a method by which you can easily read a situation, understand your own behavioral tendencies, explain your ideas and articulate your views, and connect with others.
The usefulness of this book stretches far beyond personal encounter and friendship. In his blog the other day, Seth Godin pointed out that due to technology providing easy access to better products, deals, etc, businesses will have to increasingly rely on relationships. It's pretty clear to me that S.P.A.C.E. is a pretty good starting point, and for that matter end point, for relationship building by possessing an clear understanding of social interaction.
So read Social Intelligence. I can't think of one situation in life where a better understanding of social intelligence wouldn't make you better than before reading this book. And inBubbleGuy might still be catching coffee with nice had he developed some S.P.A.C.E. (O'Reilly's probably a lost cause). 15 of you can win today, so that means the rest of you are just going to bust open that piggy bank/rainy day fund.
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